Friday, January 29, 2010

seagull steals chips

Xi'an famous foods western chinese cuisine

88 E. Broadway @ Forsyth

Sunday, January 24, 2010

fry daddy style

i finally replaced the cord to my frydaddy that i had neglected to pack up and bring with me when i moved out of williamsburg back in may 2008. that was a rough time for me, friends, what with my grandmother dying and my bed getting pissed in by my roommate's friend's friend (who everyone thought was "too nice" to pee in someone else's bed) and that girl sending me a myspace message calling me a homewrecker and my bike being stolen and that woman i moved in with on st. james in clinton hill who i ended up having to take to small claims court because she wouldn't give me back my security deposit after she proved to be a crazy ocd bitchface and thief. oh, didn't i mention any of these things on fattractive? well, of course not. this isn't the place for that.

this is the place for me to tell you that i finally made deep fried mac and cheese balls. i used all of the cheese in my fridge, some cheese i had bought, and all of my neighbor's cheese, and it still wasn't as much cheese as the recipe called for. it was more than enough, turns out, and i still have a ton of mac and cheese in my freezer because you can only eat one or two of these things before you immediately feel like you've gained 300 lbs and sprouted 3 new zits. in fact, half way through me eating my third, charlotte actually said to me "how do you stay so thin when you eat so much crap?" and i was like I'm not that thin and she was like, "well you used to be a total fattie bom batty." or something like that. maybe she said something more like i'm thinner than i used to be, but really, i'm not. i swear. friends say this to me all the time. if they haven't seen me in a while, they'll remark on how much weight i've lost. but the thing is, i've maintained the same weight since i was a freshman in college... which was over a decade ago. my hypothesis is that i have a round face and people think of me as being round when they remember me, so when they see me after a long absence, i seem thinner than their mental image of me. i don't really help to dispute that, having a blog called fattractive and all, but i guess it amuses me more than offends.

i also made some southern fried chicken on last saturday night, which was really delicious when it was the cutlets (i put fresh rosemary from my tree into the flour mix) but unfortunately the drumsticks wouldn't cook all the way through. must figure out how to combat that problem next time. i didn't try anything else after that. you can only really take so much fried in one weekend.

the night before, we tried to go to rye for heehaw's birthday dinner, but the wait was too long so we went to walter foods the next street over instead. and boy howdy am i glad we did. heehaw had the hangar steak, la gay had the nicoise, yours truly had a yummy porkchop with a cinnamon dipping sauce ftw, and daneekz ordered the $28 filet mignon plus two extra glasses of bubbly after we killed the bottle. i only mention that last part obviously because we were splitting the check 3 ways.

brunch yesterday was killer. my main squeeze lives like 2 blocks away from little giant and had a hankering for biscuits and gravy at like 9 in the morning. so i threw on my walk of shame outfit and skipped all the way there because i'd read some real nice things about it in the times only a couple of weeks ago. we were not deceived. he had what he came for plus another piping hot plate of mac and cheese and i had the cauliflower/truffle/pumpkin seed salad with an extraneous poached egg on top. everything was delicious and overpriced. when the server asked if we wanted bacon in the mac and cheese, he looked at me questioningly and i said, "do you even really need to think about that?" which we all thought was sooooooo funny. then the check came and my little comedy act cost us an additional $9. really? (snl weekend update voice) $9 to add bacon? really?

unremarkable cobb salad at sixth ward the night before...oh! how could i forget. on thursday, sue took me to see vetiver at the bell house (which is in a super scary rape alley in gowanus). we met before the show at frankies 457. she said it looked a lot like the venue she's chosen for her WEDDING and that it was one of the most enjoyable dining experiences she's had in ny (which is a big deal because she eats out the whole time she's here every time she visits). the food/service/atmosphere was all ****. dinner at georgia's earlier this month with the squeeze was also highly recommendable.

whew. that's a lot of eating out. i seriously spent way too much money this month. if i had to add all that up, i could have gotten some sharp new duds from banana republic. i wouldn't have had as much fun, though.

and finally i cannot stop listening to this song

Saturday, January 9, 2010

donut lean on doors

due to pasadoughnuts prodding, i am posting something today.

i digress already: every time i'm on the subway and see the sign "do not lean on doors," i read it in my head as "donut."

speaking of, have you had a treat from doughnut plant, yet? there's one on the LES and one about to open in chelsea ("more of a doughnut lounge") is an excerpt from a convo i had with heehaw sauce the other day about it (we were first talking about porn mags for girls because of this launch party we were going to later that night):

me: yeah i'm just disgusted by male strippers

Heather: they are so gross

me: i mean, i want a photo spread of someone cuddling me and buying me doughnuts

Heather: hahahahaha

Heather: i want someone to buy my thinly sliced italian cured meat

me: at the doughnut plant on grand in the l.e.s.

Heather: oh shit i heard that place is amazing

it is

Heather: did you try to cremem brulee doughnut?

me: i had a coconut cream filled coconut doughnut and a marizipan and he had a peanut butter glazed filled with blackberry jam and a plain glazed. they were out of creme brulee but we both wanted one. there were so many flavors i wanted to try

but they're like 3 bucks each

so next weekend

and the next weekend

and so on

i've had a lot of food situations so far in 2010, actually. this morning, my upstairs neighbor slash new good friend kristy had a little brunch party for me, anna, and charlotte. mostly for charlotte since she just got to ny for a work visit after a long four month absence. okay really it was mostly for kristy because she loves to host brunch parties and has been tearing me a new one for weeks because i spend most of my weekends with the man who buys me donuts. (i mean, wouldn't you?)

she made this delicious fluffy sausage casserole thing that she calls eggstrada. i should have taken a picture. when i get the recipe from her, i'll share it (just don't tell her).

i brought a cpl bottles of ten dolla bubbly and a gallon of oj. then we went to the awesome new flea over in this former bank building. omg. the building is breast taking. i mean, breath. sorry. charlotte and kristy spent most of the morning talking about their double d's, so i have a LOT on my mind. i had a fourteen dollar lobster roll, which means i ended up spending more on myself than on other people like i had first bragged (only 25 cents more, though, if you're counting. two onesies for my friend's boobs twins at thirty five bucks total, in case you're wondering who benefited from my selfless giving this time.) then, we went to pequena for bean dip and margaritas. yes, i know they were closed down for health code violation a few months ago, and no i don't care. it's too cute in there. it's like they peaked into my interior design dreams and puked up kitschy flower shaped xmas lights and wooden dragons hanging from the ceiling. besides, i only had some tea because i was still stuffed from the too soon lobster roll post brunch.

thursday, i had lunch at the random house cafeteria with my lovely book designer friend bella who was a little torn up about a certain someone who just broke a certain piece of shitty news to which i advised her to CUT THAT MOFO LOOSE. as i had done with another friend last weekend, my favorite piece of wisdom to dole is to walk away. i don't always practice what i preach, and i think most of my life my pride has taken over any deep seated understanding of how relationships blossom and move forward. but i'm trying this time to work a little harder. to bella, though, i'm sticking to my guns. he's not worth your time, girlfriend.

wednesday night, i had an 8 oz perfectly succulent strip of skirt steak at this totally cute argentinian restaurant azul that came with a heap of mashed potatoes and a glass of malbac, and on tuesday night i had dinner with my roommates at good ole' maggie brown. at the first, i dropped fifty bones (the meat didn't have any) and then spent almost as much at maggie brown even though i only had a sampling of sides! new york prices are stupid.

i guess this post ended up longer than i intended. but, you know, i'm glad i could give you more of me. (about 25 cents more)